If you had to come up with one question, the answer to which would decide whether you could be friends with a person you’ve just met, what would it be? What would the right answer be?
We have been dating off and on for about a year and Patricia has never spoken about where her ex-husband was living. So after all the weekend trips away, holiday celebrations, and family gatherings, I was shocked when the 6’7″, 290 pound gym owner named Brian standing above me, spotting my bench press of only 245 pounds, asked if I was dating Patricia.
Surprised with his question, I completed ten repetitions of the press, and immediately sat up swinging my legs around to ask, how do you know Patricia?
He said that his brother was married to Patricia years ago. I raised my eyebrows in amazement with his statement and my eyes must have widen to the size of kiwi fruit when he went on to say that his brother was being released from jail after serving several years for a vehicular homicide and his brother wanted to know if Patricia was dating?
Now Brian is a quiet gentle man with a career in the finance industry after ten-years in the Nation Football League. Brian said he was inquiring to see if it was ok for his brother to make contact with Patricia upon his release. I immediately stated that we are a couple and are planning to marry. Brian nodded in agreement, and said that he would tell his brother not to contact Patricia.
I asked, what were his brother’s plans upon release? Brian said he would be managing the gym. There was a moment of pause when Brian stood up and said, I guess I will give you back whats left on the gym membership. I said that would not be necessary and I would stay at the gym. We shook hands and Brian walked away.
Now, I thought to myself, could Patricia’s ex-husband and I become friends?
I would only feel comfortable with the friendship if he had an inmate lover which he was happy with. This for me would make me feel better about any threat from him attempting to rekindle a relationship with Patricia.
I also thought about Patricia’s explanation and would she want to rekindle her relationship with her ex-husband?
However my thoughts focused more on the answer Patricia would give me, which I hope would be she was too embarrassed to explain her ex-husband being in jail.
Either way, I think I will cancel my membership.