“The Tiny Non-Profit Philanthropist.”


Every sorority on campus worked hard to recruit Twins Joan and Jenny Armstrong who stand 4’9″ tall. They are in the second semester of their third year of college maintaining a 4.0-grade point average in advanced astrophysics. Neither were ever interested in the sorority life.

They recently received notoriety from the astrophysicist and cosmologist community from around the world for a paper they co-wrote about “The possibilities of space travel in relationship to astrophysics and cosmologist.

The important significance of the paper they co-wrote inspired celebrity astrophysicist, cosmologist, and author Dr. Neil DeGrasse Tyson to visit their college campus to speak with students and a private meeting with Joan and Jenny.

However, their deepest secret no one was aware of their avid gambling on NFL football games. Uniquely their college success paled in comparison to their gambling.

They designed and developed a computer algorithm with a success rate between 90 & 95% to predict the winning NFL football team while covering the point spreads.

Unbeknownst to the twins, the IRS & FBI’s simultaneously using wiretaps were conducting an investigation of offshore gambling corporations that was owned or monetarily supported by several major US Corporations.

The wiretap revealed conversations between several managers of the gambling businesses and their decision to remove the two young ladies permanently as customers after winning 6.7 billion dollars in three years.

The IRS & FBI investigated the financial background of Joan, Jenny, and their parents only to discover they never took possession of their winnings.
Instead, they transfer their winnings to “tiny” non-profits organizations around the world with less than one-million dollars in operating budgets.

Surprisingly they both worked part-time at a fast food restaurant on campus, and they were attending college on a 4- year scholarship and the recent paper brought fellowships and scholarship offers from around the world.

The IRS and the FBI decided to make contact with the young ladies when the wiretap confirmed a kill order for Joan & Jenny, the “Tiny non-profit philanthropists”?

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  2. Yes, apparently the winnings are too much! It might had been better to win smaller yet steady amounts and transfer the winnings to the charities…sigh, it was not fraud, just genius but they are not allowed to use their talent!

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